6 year old daughter constantly invading personal space

My daughter is often very close to my face while talking (if she's eating she will be spitting food while she's doing it), she pokes my face, she squeezes my nose extremely hard, squeezes herself between people, and many times hurts me or others without realizing it. I noticed something I had seen countless times before when were celebrating a birthday the other day. I wanted to get a picture of my two daughters with their daddy so I asked my 6 year old to go over with them. My older daughter is 9 and she was already sitting next to my husband across the table from us. My 6 year old climbed under the table and wedged herself between my husband and my other daughter. She bumped her daddy and practically knocked her sister over when she did this and got very upset/frustrated/feelings hurt when we told her not to do that.


I have always felt like something was a little different about her and other members of the family are sure she had ADHD. So, I did an internet search and SPD came up. It got me thinking of various seemingly unrelated "quirks" she has had since she was a baby. She was a very quiet and calm baby. She actually went through a long stage where she would not open her mouth. I remember looking at her as she squeezed her lips together. She didn't babble much and at nine months my mother pointed out to me that she still wasn't sitting up on her own. I took her to therapy and they said she had a weak core.

She was eventually able to roll over, sit up, etc. She always had things in her mouth...necklaces, quarters, anything she could find so we learned to keep everything where she couldn't get it. As a toddler she used to squeeze between me and the sink, and try to walk up my legs if i was doing dishes or getting something out of the cabinet. She would bump into my face with hers while I was holding her. These things always caused me a considerable amount of pain but she seemed fine. She would even hurt when she hugged me so I talked to her about showing love gently.

That took a long time to change but she tries to be more careful now. When she gets angry, she gets very angry very fast, but then she qets over it quickly. Now she is 6 and she gets distracted while getting dressed. I keep her near me in the morning so I can tell her step by step what to do or she will still be in her underwear when it's time to got to school. She's very intelligent and is reading above grade level but has horrific handwriting, spacing issues, big letters/little letters, etc. She seems to have a hard time copying from the board.

When I ask her to do something she either doesn't hear me or she ignores me. I think it might be both. If she's watching t.v. or concentrating on an activity she likes, forget it, It's like she's in a trance. It does seem to help if I touch her on the shoulder and look her in the eyes when I ask her to do something but she still gets confused with the directions.

She has recently started repeating my directions back to me. She'll say, "Soooo, you mean you want me to go get my shorts in the bathroom and put them in the laundry room? Ohhhhh!" But she still gets distracted most of the time on the way to getting her shorts. She is always touching things she's not supposed to be touching which ususally ends up with her dropping it and breaking it. She drops things a lot. She is constantly talking to herself and has a couple imaginary friends.

She is always itchy. She has vitiligo on her back and I always thought that was the reason but she wants me to scratch her back but she also wants me to scratch her belly, her legs, her arms. She has bouts with digestive issues and has had traces of blood in her stool off and on since she was born. She loves all things sweet and full of carbohydrates so I always thought that her digestive problems were diet related. We did change her diet but she still attempts to eat bread, doughnuts, or anything like that if she has the chance.

I'm becoming more and more concerned now that she has finished kindergarten. She would tell me that she doesn't have any friends and nobody will play with her at recess. I would find her sitting about 5 feet away from everyone else at the lunch table and when I asked her why she didn't sit next to the other kids she just said she wanted to sit there. That happened almost every day. She seems to be getting more and more upset with herself if she can't follow directions or if she hurts me by accident.

She is such a loving, sweet, smart, funny little girl and I hate to see her struggle like this. I have a feeling my husband is going to think I am being paranoid, which is the reason I have written down almost everything that has occurred in her 6 years. I appreciate any input or guidance anyone has to offer.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to The SPD Q & A.