Anger and Mood Swings

by Stephani Brender
(Roy, Washington)

I believe my 4 1/2 yr old has SPD: he seems to exhibit sensory seeking behaviors and hyposensitivity as I checked things off on the lists provided. He is VERY moody and has been since he was born. Difficult, hard to please, yells, pushes, hits, slams into everyone in the family. He has very good verbal skills, good hand/eye coordination, although something with communication is out of sync. I call it stubbornness, but when he is told over and over again for years now what consequences will be for bad behavior, he still chooses the bad behavior. It takes an hour or more sometimes for him to figure out that his bad behavior has to be corrected in order for him to either get out of a time out or get whatever priviledge has been taken away. It's exhausting and daily!

He's very bright and has a mechanical mind - has always wanted to know exactly how everything works from the inside out - plumbing, electrical, motors, etc. He's been asking these questions since he was 2. Usually when my husband, 18 yr old son, or I have him alone he is easier to deal with now, but we have SO much trouble when he and his little sister who is 2 1/2 are together - he lashes out at her when she won't do exactly what he wants - hits, bites, jumps on her, pours dirt on her head if they are outside playing, pours water in her face if they are bathing - it makes me feel like he is an abuser towards her and I don't want her to be subject to this and grow up thinking that it's normal to be treated this way. Of course we always stop him and talk, and punish if necessary. He's also always had issues with his clothes and been very picky about his sleeves, socks and zippers being exactly just so. Also he used to HATE the radio being on in the car, but now it doesn't bother him as much. He screams a lot but then hates it when he hears other kids doing it.

Do kids outgrow this? Kindergarten is just around the corner for us and I don't know if I should have him checked out or even where I should go for that. What do you think?

The SPD Help Line Answers

First, PLEASE accept my sincere apology… your submission was buried and I just stumbled across it… I am sorry it took so long to post! My apologies.

Second, the bottom line is NO, kids do not outgrow this on their own. If it is SPD, this will need therapeutic intervention. It does indeed sound like your son may show significant signs of SPD and should be checked out for that as well as ruling out other developmental issues/diagnoses. Yes, you should have him evaluated, and everything you need to know to get this all started is on my page called… A Step By Step Guide For SPD Parents; The Seven Steps For Helping Your SPD Child You will also want to look at my various newsletters and the site map to see what applies to you and the questions you may need answered.

Start with these three things and let us know if you have further questions. I hope they help!

Take good care.

Michele Mitchell