Concerned Mom

by Claire
(Wisconsin)

How do I begin? My son is 17 and a senior in high school. He was born prematurely, and was diagnosed with Sensory Integrative Disorder at approximately 12 months. He had Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy and Speech Therapy between 12 and 36 months. He progressed very well, and was considered "cured" - able to participate in normal life.


He has always been bright, and was considered very intelligent as a young child. He was able to converse with adults well, though he didn't have a lot of close friends his own age. Physically he was behind a bit, but managed alright. He never did learn to ride a bike - had balance issues.

I never really attributed the problems that he continues to have to SID, until I found the checklist. Many of the things that have been frustrating to us over the years are things that are found on that checklist! He still only eats a few foods - hamburgers (no cheese), pizza, and plain ham sandwiches. There are a few other things, but our menus have changed drastically trying to make things that he will eat. He will not try new things. He speaks very loudly, not realizing that he is almost yelling. He has never like being hugged, and when he is distressed or sad or hurt, never wants me to console him. (We have on occasion thought he might be slightly autistic!) He is extremely sensitive to pain, and has fainted when he's had blood drawn. He's very tall and gangly, and seems to "overstep" where he's headed, and steps on things he's trying to avoid. He still can't ride a bike!

We are having some personality issues now as well. I wasn't really attributing these to SID either, but the more I think about it, it would explain a lot of what we're dealing with! He is loud as I mentioned before, and is always fighting with our other children. He seems to thrive on conflict and yelling. He says things that aren't acceptable to us - not necessarily swearing, but just saying things that are not hormal for people to say, i.e. saying that he's not going to graduate, or that he is allergic to food as a way to explain why he's not eating. The things he says aren't funny, they're stupid and embarrassing to us. People think he's weird, strange, and unpleasant. I love him dearly, but I don't know how much more of it I can take!

My biggest concern is that he's going to college next year. How will he function? How will he manage? Will he have any friends? I know I sound like an overprotective mother, but I am truly worried that we haven't prepared him at all to be able to take care of himself in the real world. We've tried to do all of the right things, but as I look back, I think that SID had a lot to do with the problems he's had all along.

I guess I'm looking for reassurance that he can survive as an adult and won't be a social outcast. If there's anyone out there that can relate to what I've described and has a positive comment, I'd sure appreciate hearing it!!!

Thank you!

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Jan 03, 2010
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I'm in the same boat
by: Anonymous

My son is also 17. Same issues with food & sibling conflicts. He refuses to "manage" his own stuff. Clothes, dishes, books, papers...all a big organizational disaster.

On the plus side his is very smart. His grades suffers due to handwriting and disorganization issues, but his standardized test scores are amazing.

I think his saving grace had been success on the swim team. Swimming is very therapeutic for him. It also gives him a ready-made social group.

I am also worried about college, but I have to hope that he will step it up when he is forced to.

Jan 03, 2010
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good luk.
by: Anonymous

Do not be discouraged, is now at the stage of adolescence and the result accentuate.con growth will improve. support them and if you can help him with appropriate treatment. good luck.

Jan 02, 2010
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sounds like my husband and he turned out ok
by: Anonymous

wow. I understand your worries-my husband has always considered himself awkward-has minimal friends-i am always telling him to be quiet and definitely has sensory issues plus says inappropriate things at times-i call it lack of tact but let me tell you-now that we have many kids i am seeing the sensory issues play out and one has sensory plus ADHD-that's where a lot of the behavioral stuff comes out as. Take him to a neuropsych doc and take one step at a time. it's not too late to help if he indeed needs it-and maybe he doesn't but do yourself the favor-my husband gets frustrated with himself because he knows he is different-he is very successful by the way-great dad, very involved, successful-we have 2 homes and i am able to be home days with kids. do not lose hope.

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