My 8 year old had a bad day at school ,my friend still doesn't understand..im all alone!

by Dawn fillinger
(Warren mi.)

My son had a bad day at school! He was tired and was allowed to lie down,but then after he did told he owed work! He has SPD and should've been told this first! Anyway I want home when he got off the bus,my brother was who thinks I just coddle him too much. Then my son told my brother im ripping up my homework and the note from the teacher, instead of taking it away my brother who has no kids let alone one like mine a told him go ahead your mom will be mad at you and you'll get grounded!


So of course my son did just that! When I arrived home I heard all about it,but knew before I got out of the car he had a bad day as he was not at the door. I went to my sons room which is also his safe place always has been to hear how he was doing and and he said "you're mad at me right?' "you hate me right?' Im just a bad kid!" I said "No i don't like the choice you made but I'm not mad, I know you were very upset, and everyone gets upset! I love you very much and that will never change! and you are most certainly not a bad boy or kid, you just had a bad day, and the choices that were made can be made differently tomorrow. He crawled under his bed "yeah but Uncle said you were gonna ground me and be mad" "Yeah well Uncle doesn't know everything now does he?" lol.. come on out I didn't get a hug and you can tell me in your words what happened..Well the tears started and that's how I found out the teacher didn't tell him until after that he had to make up the work.*sigh*

My child goes to a school with children who have behavioral problems all 80 of them, 10 per class plus one teacher and two aides and guess what not a one has read even the "The Out-of-Sync Child" but we have a sensory room, she (the teacher) tells me and he didn't want to do any of them just kick us..Really Im gonna go through this again? Where I do all the work and write papers so my child gets the right OT and they understand him at his special school?

Anyway my friend bought my son monster jam tickets so he could go with his cub scouts (it fits his structure and moral compass well) he calls me after I write about the homework ripping and says 'Should I tell him im disappointed in him especially after I bought these tickets?" He's just MANIPULATING things by ripping his homework and then saying he's worried about you loving him and being a bad kid, and that is being a bad kid" I said listen read the book, he couldn't help it, and I dont want to talk to you right now goodbye!

I am so sick of people saying they understand and then making such ignorant statements!!!! ok this just happened and im still seeing red, but how many times can i explain to people that my son feels bad about himself no matter how many times i prop him up or tell him i love him or show him because of this disorder?????

Comments for My 8 year old had a bad day at school ,my friend still doesn't understand..im all alone!

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Aug 10, 2012
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I don't understand either...
by: Anonymous

I don't have a child with SPD. I do have a child. I certainly do NOT agree with "whooping" the boy, that's just stupid. I think what the mom is doing is good, reinforcing with love. However, for how long can these actions be reinforced with love without any real-world consequences? What are any consequences of his behavior and what, if anything, would encourage him to try harder in future circumstances? While I'm sure the mom has tried "everything" to help ensure her sons improvement, "everything" hasn't been tried. No one is an expert in these situations, including the "teachers". They're human too, I'm sure they get frustrated when the things they've been "trained or educated to do" are totally ineffective. The only "expert" in this situation is mom. And while love is a better way than any punishment in my mind, there has to be a consequence. I don't think having to make up the work is unreasonable. This may be a terrible thing to say but one day this boy will be on his own or won't have his mom to show him unconditional love. She should help him to learn better ways to cope with these situations so they aren't "end of the world" scenarios for him. To conclude, this mom sounds like a mother of all moms, one with love to spare. This boy went to the right mother. I'm sure you don't think it most times but God chose you for him. Keep up the great work!

Aug 02, 2012
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Understanding is hard
by: Anonymous

Understanding is hard when they only want to understand what they want to understand! I go through this with my family and friends about my son he has ADHA and SPD. I always here oh hes just not listening, hes is getting over on you, If you whooped him more you wouldn't have those problems, Your not having enough consistency blah blah blah. I can explain until I'm blue in the faceand all they want to see is a bad child. You get to the point where you do feel like your the only one trying to help your child become strong and able to take on the world. I now face these issues with his school not once has he harmed a child but cant control him self and it's a problem for them.Hoping for birghter days and someone to get it. I Know it's Hard but God placed The most important job in your hands being his mother as the same me. Keep fighting and never give up you will Smile in the end.

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