My Life

by feez
(england)

When i was younger i would have peculiar habits that nobody understood. i would walk on my toes and i would sometimes hate it when people would hug me and sometimes i would want a cuddle. sometimes i needed protection. i would dislike getting kissed. i would cry at very loud noises and i would be confused as to why i was upset because my brother always enjoyed it.

I'm still overly sensitive, i would cry every time i would see a really sick kid or i would cry my eyes out when i was watching a movie with a person who would be in any pain. i have never been able to do puzzles. i do not know the difference between left or right and could not process the direction when someone told me go left or go right. i have always had difficulty when i write, i would constantly loose my place when i would read or do math, my writing would always go in a slant and my spellings would be a mess. the most common phrase out of my mouth has been "im so frustrated!!!" or "im sooooo stressed out" or "i feel depressed" or "mum, please help me!!!!" although i have always shut myself off in my room never showing any emotion. when my joke around with me as a joke and try to scare me i get extremely startled and have to control tears and show a smile. i shiver till about fifteen minutes after it though. sometimes i can hear the buzzing of a machine or the ticking of a clock and feel like breaking it because i would not be able to take my focus off it.

I would get frustrated when my mum would be on her cell phone because she would be clicking the buttons and the noise would beat in my head and would make me angry. i would start screaming at her to stop clicking and she would not understand why i would do it. i have never been able t touch anything rough without feeling the sensation of it all over my body, it feels horrible. i can not wear clothes with labels on them because i would feel like spiders would crawl over my body. the list could go on and on ...