Non-verbal toddler

by Susan
(Gwinnett County, Georgia, USA)

My 14 month old grandson is non-verbal. He shows some signs of autism, but then doesn't show other signs. He has good eye contact, plays peek-a-boo, can smile and giggle with his 2 year old sister, and can find a "hidden" object, has started walking, and can copy simple actions demonstrated by an adult, such as putting a small ball in a cube. On the other hand, he shakes his head back and forth and bangs his head on furniture and flaps his arms. He hasn't pointed to anything, nor does he wave "bye" or copy sounds. His doctor diagnosed him as "failure to thrive" a few months back, but he has gained up to 19 pounds. At birth he was 6 pounds and 2 weeks premature. The backside of his head was very flat, his head was larger than his body, and he constantly sounded congested when he slept. He held his left arm out at his side stiffly when picked up. At 8 months old he was hospitalized for a week with RSV and pneumonia, and had to continue breathing treatments once he was back at home. Afterwards he refused to eat or take a bottle. He has somewhat of a frail appearance. He doesn't imitate words, doesn't point to body parts, doesn't look at books, and doesn't look in the direction when I'm pointing and saying, "Go get the ball." Overall, what could be going on with my grandson? My gut feeling is something is not right, but I can't put my finger on it.