5 yr old with SPD should I delay kindergarten?

Hello,




I have a 5 yr old with SPD in a pre K program at the local public school. He has an IEP, support and has been relatively successful in the program. Still his teacher recommend that he stay in the pre k classes and delay Kindergarten for another year. They think he is socially immature and lacks some independent skills, such as using the public bathrooms on his own.

I want to do what is best for him but I am just not sure what that is. Will holding him in pre K give him what he needs to mature with his peer group, make friends...I am not sure being with younger kids will help him. I am a bit sad that he won't be moving forward with friends and cousins:( do you have any experience with this to share? Thank you!!!



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Apr 09, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		same thing
by: Anonymous

Hi,
My daughter has a late August birthday and I am holding her back. Our school will not offer a shadow/assistant for her- and my daughter would be lost in a classroom of 18. However- her Florida pre-K teachers are all pushing to SEND her...
You should do what you think is best. While I feel sad that my daughter won't be with her peers...it beats sending her and repeating kindergarten and watching her classmates move ahead! My daughter has little attention span and focus- so I am struggling with getting the right IEP for her.
I hope you are happy with your decision.
I know MANY parents who held back their children (in other states) and the children had no issues. In my daughter's school, most of the children go into class reading already...
Mar 26, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		Hold back/Maturity level
by: Anonymous

My son is 5 and is in Kindergarten. We faced the same dilemma when he was in Pre-k. We had all the services in place as well as private OT. But he struggled socially, expressed some behavior issues, and had a real difficulty with transitioning.We decided not to hold him back, and we are happy with our decision.

Academically he is in all the excelled programs. He loves the extra challenge and it boost his confidence in other areas-such as social development. Being around kids his own age or even a little older, has helped him greatly with social cues and expectations. Because he is a visual learner, and has been able to watch others behaviors and responses, he has been able to learn by experience rather than visual flash cards.

He does have a special needs parapro in the morning to assist the teacher and he can go to the Special needs room if he needs to have some down time (or reset). Because he is a very emotive, we felt mainstreaming him and building his confidence was our best approach. It was a little rocky in the beginning, mainly with the general ed teacher, because she felt it was always defiance or behavior. When many times there were triggers.

Now she will talk with him if their week is going to be different than the normal routine, because she has learned that it will make all the difference in his response. As a parent, I can see the advantages to both sides. I think it depends on the child. I know my child was very aware of his surroundings, his differences from others and holding him back would have effected his self-esteem. For other children, that may not be a factor. But I have seen my little man come a long way this year. In Pre-K I felt he just kept regressing. I wish you well in this challenging but wonderful journey with your child.
Mar 24, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		Also have 5 yr old in similar position
by: Anonymous

I have 5 year old twins with July birthdays who will be 6 this summer. Although only 1 has SPD we decided to wait on Kindergarten for both and are very happy w/ the decision. One guy is more than ready for Kindergarten, and my other is just now becoming ready. We have all the academics covered, letter/sound recognition, early writing, early math, etc., and we are also working on fine-tuning social issues. The plan is to keep working these over the summer and start K this fall. We also struggle with potty issues, and know there will probably be some accidents but that is life and we will take it one day at a time.

IEP's can be changed, and if the kids need help in something it can be written in to get the help they need. I am hoping once he's in school with his peers to model some things will come along on their own. Like the other posters, I think it's a really personal choice but for me I absolutely think the extra year was key for us to be successful. Good luck with your guy!
Mar 23, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		thank you
by: Anonymous

Thank you all so much to responding, it gives me some good thoughts about my next steps and conversations to have with his teachers
Mar 23, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		Just ,y opinion, but...
by: Anonymous

If he has an IEP, you put it in his IEP, that he has an aid, whether it be all the time or at , say, bathroom time, and to help him stay on task!
If i kept mine back, he wouldn't have gotten as far as he is...he has an aid in kindergarten right now.

Most of the time when they see their peers doing it, eventually they will want to do it on their own.

But remember "YOU ultimately have the last say as his mom!!!!!

Go with your heart.....
Good luck, Kim
Mar 23, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		Individuality
by: Anonymous

I had the same situation with my son. He was academically fine, socially a little behind. His birthday is July so he was one of the younger ones in class. I held him back and I think it helped him a lot. This is a personal decision and no one can give you the 'right' answer. I thought about it and weighed the pros and cons and made the best decision for my son. You have to ask why the teacher made the recommendation, they usually won't if the academics are there without good cause. Do some research as to where the milestones are for his age and how close is he to them? Follow your heart, no matter what is best for the cousins or friends.
Mar 21, 2010
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starstarstarstarstar 		SPD delay in kindergarten
by: Anonymous

Hi?I am a VPK (pre-K) teacher in Florida and was looking at this site because my 6 yr has just been diagnosed with SPD. I have/had children with SPD in my class before. My question is to you, how old is your son? If he is a summer birthday then that could be why he is having social delays? If social and emotional are the only areas of delay and not academics then I would send him on if he is already 5. However, if he is struggling in academics and a late birthday you may want to hold him back. I am trying to think of it from the teacher?s perspective as to why they made this recommendation. I held back a student last year who birthday was not until August, he was not recognizing any letters, letter sounds, prewriting or had social concerns. I still see this student and he is still having the same delays. The next step is to have an evaluation for a disability. You know your child better than anyone else and you know how he would do. I know here in Florida Kindergarten is a big jump from pre-K. Hope this helps.

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