I needed to have my stomach held in tight

by Galen

When I was a young boy, I had a cousin in her teens who always used to hold me on her lap. And somehow there was an unspoken custom between us, that she always had to hold me with her hands pulled way back deep into my stomach. She would hold me quite tightly, with my stomach held in an inch or two deep.

I was perfectly content as long as she was holding my stomach in tight like this. I guess our family looked on it as just one of those quirky things. It continued until my cousin went away to college.

I also asked my babysitter to hold me this way, with her hands sunk back into my stomach "just as tight as you possibly can." It was a simple way to keep me entertained, so any time she came over to babysit she would hold me on her lap with my stomach pulled in extremely tight. She was a big farmgirl, and she used to hold my stomach in just about as absolutely tight as was physically possible. I don't think it could have gotten any tighter. And then I was quiet and perfectly satisfied, and we would watch TV together as she held my stomach in all through her favorite TV shows.

I also sometimes wore my belt pulled in really tight, I would pull it in to the last notch and I remember I wanted it even tighter. And I remember riding in the back seat of our car on vacation trips, with my seat belt pulled in on my stomach just as tight as it would go.

I never understood what all this was about. I don't think anyone did back in those days. We had never heard of SPD, it was just one of those things! I needed to have my stomach held in tight. I needed it, and it calmed me when my stomach was held way back in. To this day I've never entirely outgrown it. It's been a great relief to learn about SPD on this site, and to realize I'm not alone!

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