It feels like Im possessed sometimes.
Sometimes I feel like I'm not even living in my own body. Im a 19 year old female and ive always struggled with relating my body to my mind. I've been in pain for as long as I remember, everyday my body hurts. Sometimes just my lower back and hips, sometimes every joint and muscle aches to the point when it consumes me in a cloud.
My head is often foggy, I have migraines with only on and off headaches but mostly just the aura, the brain fog, sensitivity to light and total lack of balance. I have frequent anxiety attacks as I find myself overreacting to situations with such intensity that my brain is overloaded.
Sometimes I feel like my head is going to pop with all the pressure and all the information its receiving. I love to dance but often stumble and trip over my own feet because of vertigo. I love to create jewelry and create art and clothing, I have particular specifications for the things that I surround myself with or wear and so I make things myself so they are just right. Like with clothing I cant stand synthetic fabrics and go to extreme lengths to only wear organic velvet, silk, satin and hemp.
I cant stand jeans or dress's with high empire waist bands or shoes. I have fibromyalgia but have only recently realized that it may come hand in hand with SPD.
Thank you for reading.