My story......

by ash

My son has always been different, i dont know what to do anymore. Hes always been difficult, he would never sleep, barely eat anything but one food, just everything you can imagine.

Every year got worse, and at first i thought ok hes going through terrible twos, then ok hes changing into a little man at three, now were at four and it seems like were going backwards, my son was a late talker, and still has not perfected it which is very frustrating, since hes turned four its been terrible. Before we were able to play around and have fun color watch movies just enjoy each other now its like i dont even want to talk to him.

He just started pre k, he doesn't follow directions which we expected for someone coming to school for the first time, i have to tell him everyday to keep his hands to himself, he doesn't talk to the kids, hes literally in his own world, ill give him a cup of water and hell just go pore it out in the sink, he slams doors and locks them, and will even throw himself into the door, if me oe his father tell him no hell no hell go to the other and say daddy or mommy so and so said this, you cant have a normal conversation with him because he acts like he doesn't hear you, he still will not sleep through the night and just wakes up for no reason in the middle of the night, hes loud, and now is starting

to lie and cry all the time! hell cry if i tell him to put his clothes, or take a bath just anything, if you cry in front of him he wont even notice, hes just obsessed with trains thats all he talks about from morning to night since he was two and its driving me crazy!

I know somethings wrong and i think its asperger syndrome but in a couple of weeks well e paying his physician a visit, and getting that going, he also acts like he cant hear i ask him are his ears and everything ok and he says yes but you have to repeat everything like ten times, hes going for a full check up and were going to get rolling with everything to figure out whats going on because im concerned when he starts kindergarten because he cant follow directions, i dont know what to do and im depressed im miserable, im now seeing a psychiatrist, its horrible, i was so excited to take him to school every morning but now when i drop him off i get asked questions about home or i get the thirty min talk of everything he did the day before and it always ends with but itll get better and i hope it does i really do, sometimes the days are so bad i just keep thinking to myself, is this really my life, is this real? but i realize i need to be patient because my son needs me and may need professional help, so all i can do is pray

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Mar 18, 2011
I hear you
by: Kelly

I have a four year old son who is the most beautiful, funny, fun loving little man you ever want to meet. One year ago when he was in pre school we started working with a private organization for children with behavioral problems. My son did every thing you could imagine and more. I spent every day wondering what the teacher was going to tell me about today, and feared taking him out of school because it was always so much more involved than what other parents seemed to be going through. After we got our son help, and learned how to help him, I have come to understand that my son has taught me more than I have taught him. Every child can learn, right wrong behavior, and become more functioning.

Look for the best help you can find, roll up your sleeves and get ready for a new day, because I promise you they are ahead! You are not alone and your love will help carry you!

Jan 20, 2011
thanks for your post
by: ash

I praise my son everyday and so do his teachers, i drive everyday for a hr and a half one way to get my son in a school that can handle his uniqueness and work with him, I know my son is awesome and i tell him everyday, hes very intelligent, but bragging about him is not what this post is suppose to be about, I do not mind if my son has to go to a psychiatrist and never said i did mind, all i want to do is connect with other parents, who feel they need to talk, and who feel like they are alone, because i have gone though this and still am going through this, everyones child is special and every parent can name things about their children they love, but once again this is not a bragging post. There is no definition of normal, and my goal was never to say hey my child is not normal can you find out whats wrong with him?

My goal is to help my son, so he does not have to struggle, i can either ignore the problem or address it early on, I know my life with my son is going to be difficult but it will prob be more difficult for him and i am ready for that. I struggle everyday, and go to a psychiatrist, For moms out there who go through this you are not alone, i have spoken to many moms who have been close to committing suicide because they could not handle their children, its ok to talk, and find helpful websites like this.

Jan 20, 2011
Normal is as Normal Does
by: Anonymous

You are not in this alone. There are so many children out there with even more problems, worse problems, etc. I don't know you, only what you have written. Our daughter has SPD and isn't very well in reading or math. A teacher helped us identify her uniqueness at age 7. The one thing I was asked was "What is normal to you?" I had all these ideals in my head, they were just that, ideals. Your child and family will be only "normal" to his uniqueness, whether is be SPD, Aspergers, OCD, ADHD and on and on. You will find a place for him to thrive through learning, searching and implementing different ideas and finding the ones that are best for you and your family. The effort of doing everything you can to help your child reach the potential he has adn watching him progress is the reward.

So what if he has to go to a psychiatrist, or psychologist. He really needs to be evaluated by at least 2 professionals that deal with diagnosing these type of behaviors. If you feel in your heart that what they are saying isn't best for your child, find someone else, but don't live in denial also. There is so much information and resources available to us nowadays it can be overwhelming even. He's your child and you'll do what's best for him. I would definitely have the pediatrician do a full panel of blood tests on him and also have extensive allergy testing done, sometimes it's just as simple or complex of being allergic to something unknown to you.

Find a good OT, I pray your insurance will cover this, it's not cheap, but they can also give you suggestions and ideas for at home, what do to when you're away, etc. You said he's in preschool and you're afraid what Kindergarten will bring, don't be, be prepared. You have a bit before the new school year, use it to your advantage, research your school and district, what type of accomodations will they provide for your son. Talk with the couselor of the school and see what they suggest. If he isn't thriving in his preschool, find a different one you can work with and talk with and who will look to help your child instead of spending 30 minutes telling you what he did wrong.

You mentioned everything he does wrong, write down everything he does RIGHT, did he use the bathroom himself, did he eat, did he wake up in a good mood, it doesn't matter what positive thing it is, recognize it, praise him for it, praise yourself for recognizing it.

God Bless.

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