"Oh, He's just all boy"-- No, i think it's SPD
by Amy S
So many parents have worries. constantly questioning all the little stuff asking, "is this normal? is that normal?"
And most of the time- it totally is normal.
But i believe in parental intuition too, and have always felt there was something just a little "off" about my son (who is 6). Now I KNOW, with all my being, he has SPD and i need help with finding some resources. I need tools to help him succeed. what do you think?
He if fully functional. not on the autism spectrum, not add/adhd.
He is adorable.
He is very smart.
He is very, very well liked by all his teachers, and i would say, anyone who meets him.
He has a cute little smile, is respectful, and did i mention smart?
However, he also has a side that is becoming more and more painful to watch as the years go on, as i realize he can't control it.
My pediatrician dismissed it and said "oh, he's just all boy. he'll grow up to be a thrill seeker, but it's also a sign of significant intelligence".
I walked away knowing that wasn't fully the answer, but tried to swallow it and believe it.
But i can't ignore it any longer.
He seeks out and craves- i mean CRAVES physical stimulation.
He always seems to be on the floor, rolling, crashing into something.
oh, the crashing and falling...
probably things most "all boy" kids do. Only his is constant, significant, and no amount of intervention, or trying to calm him down can stop him.
At home, he will run from the kitchen to the living room, slam himself against the wall and fall down, laughing at the game he is playing. he will jump from one chair to the other, and then dive roll onto the floor.
a trip to the grocery store is a nightmare. he can't help but run as fast as he can down the aisle, and slide on his knees and then roll around.
sounds like just a wild, undisciplined kid maybe with ADHD right?
no, he is very controlled in other things. respectful and disciplined in all other areas (well, except eating and affection).
And he CAN sit still and focus on something. if we are playing a game and he is focused, his 'crashing' is significantly lessened.
and no, it's not boredom or anxiety. he's got a pretty stress free and active life.
Lets go back a bit farther shall we?
as a younger child, before he could ride a bike, he LOVED taking his big wheel down the driveway, doing a hard right turn so he would
flip it and crash.
oh, and he does NOT, nor has he ever felt pain like a normal kid. his teachers have commented on this as well. i have seen him take falls that would make a grown man cry, and he just gets up and laughs.
he had an earache once, that i knew nothing about... until he started to cry a bit one day. crying? well that's not like my kid, something msut be wrong. He told me his ear hurt a bit, and within an hour, his eardrum ruptured. My god, it was that bad before he even gave me a wimper!
ironically, his coordinator is outstanding, and he's been skateboarding since he was 5- because he loves to fall.
hugs? nothing gentle about them. he will dive into you. he doesn't want gentle rubbing, he wants hard bear hugs.
there's just so much more i could write about. his eating is another issue, that i won't delve deeply into now. do you know any child that puts hot sauce on their food? or that has eaten so much that their stomach is protruding and hard, but he still says he's hungry?
I am at my wits end because i just know this is something his body craves doing, that he clearly does not feel normal sensations, and i feel bad for always telling him to relax, calm his body down. I understand this is how he is, and no longer "yell" at him about it because it is clear to me he just can't stop. I am trying to give him appropriate outlets- but need more constructive help and ideas.
How do i help him regulate this himself?
alot of people dismiss it- he is just "all boy".. active, and physical.
yea, that makes sense when you see him running around on the playground for a short time each day.
i watch him do this day and night...
Each day, it hurts me more and more to watch, as i know deep down, it's just not at a normal level.
people try to make it out to be a good thing "oh, he'll be stunt man someday, or a thrill seeking sky diver"...
yeah, maybe. and that is fine if he chooses it. But he could also develop a whole host of other problems if i don't teach him healthy ways to deal with things too. i don't want to get frustrated and scold him for constantly, and literally "bouncing off the wall"- i want to identify this and help him deal with this internal craving he has in the best way i can....