Sensory Processing Disorder or just very Anxious?
Hello... I am 17 years old and I am in my second year of college. I am not quite too sure if this is just something that is part of my Dyspraxia/visual stress problems.
I have always had certain ‘quirks’ which (partly due to the stress of taking Alevels) seem to have become ‘problems’. These ‘problems’ do not seem to quite fit with my diagnosis of Dyspraxia/visual stress difficulties.
My family have also become very annoyed with my behavior. I find noisy environments and certain noises such as dog barking, Vacuum cleaner, microwave…etc very overwhelming.
Even though I do have my own self strategies to push myself through, after going to social gatherings and college I always seem to feel very ill and tired- I feel I need somewhere quiet to calm down. It’s a bit like someone has opened too many internet tabs on a computer -I shut down.
It is often very difficult to find a place to be quiet. If I don’t find a quiet place I suffer from Nervous exhaustion.
My agitation of noises is not something new. When I was a toddler at playgroup, I would often either fall asleep or become difficult and want to go home. When I started school, I would often go home and have frequent tantrums for no reason.
Keeping control of my noise sensitivity is not helped by how I am overly emotional, and I tend to become fixated/obsessed with things. I get very socially stressed, and as well as the noise, I find masking the fact that I don’t understanding what people intentions are (e.g. I have never understood facial expressions and do not use emojis when texting expect the simplistic ones). very draining.
I find I put more effort into concentrating on daily tasks . I am more effective if I fidgets with something or randomly look at something on the internet/take a visual break.
At college I will often shake my leg, at home I jump up and down/rock. When I was younger I use to be (until it got broken) very obsessed with my trampoline and at the playground I would spend hours on the swings. It as if I lose feelings of things-I have often had terrible blisters and did not realised
until I take my sock off.
I seem to fall over and not feel any pain or feel it later. I seem to also frequently drop things/misplace things and I can be quite careless and clumsy as I put too much pressure on things e.g. I unintentionally slam doors and I am a noisy messy eater.
My disorganisation, carelessness and clumsiness are not helped by the fact that objects seem to split into two, and I struggle to locate things (it’s as if I don’t notice clutter!).
In a similar way to how I seem to lose feeling of things, it takes me ages to get out of bed and get ready for college. Though ironically, I have a difficult time settling down and getting ready to for bed.
I do not know how hot or cold something is. Alike to how I have a confused feeling of pain I also do know if I feel hungry and I have tendency to overeat. However when I was younger (Now I seem to be less sensitive) I was very sensitive to certain textures. My Mum commented that as soon as I was dressed, and we were ready to go to preschool I would take off all my clothes again.
I hated having my hair tied up/wearing hair clips/being brushed or washed. I did not like wearing jewelry or tights and preferred trousers. I would also get my Mum to cut out labels in my clothes.
I am not too sure if I have Sensory processing disorder/ Asperger, if I have sensory issues as part of my Dyspraxia or if this is something else as recently I keep hearing ringing in my ears and I have never had a issue with oral input/smells. I am not too sure if these issues will improve as around the ages of 9/10, when I started secondary school some of these ‘problems’ became ‘quirks’.
My difficulties with coordination/visual stress/concentration/spatial awareness, and social situations were still ‘problems’. I would occasionally find noisy environments overwhelming and in noisy situations I would frequently ‘freeze’/zone out and I still found temperature/pain confusing .
Though overall the sensory part of my ‘quirks’ were not so much of a ‘problem’ until the end of year 11 and when I started college.