Social Skills & ADHD

My son is almost ten and it breaks my heart to see him struggling within his friendships. Every time he experiences a rejection from a so called friend or parent of the friend, I feel his pain.

We are doing Social Skills Training once a week but it's not enough. I wish I could see what was going on at school for him and why he is getting rejected so often. Has anyone got any suggestions for me to help him socially?

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Aug 12, 2021
rejection sensitive dysphoria
by: elalan

Hey! It sounds like your son is experiencing Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, or RSD. As a teen with ADD, I myself can relate to the terrible feeling of rejection... Basically, RSD is a fairly common part of ADD/ADHD where anytime the individual is rejected, whether that rejection be real or just perceived as such, they feel like absolute crap. Unfortunately, there is no medication or specific treatment for RSD. This also means that your son's classmates may not actually be rejecting him/intending to reject him, it's just how he perceives it!

From my experience, the best way to treat RSD is to find + develop the coping skills that work best for the individual. You can't make RSD go away but you can learn how to tolerate it and give yourself time for it to pass! Another thing about RSD is that it usually doesn't last very long, certainly not forever; for me, it ranges from 1 minute to 1 day. I suggest you read up on it more but hopefully this helps!

Aug 29, 2012
i feel your pain
by: elizabeth

my son is 10 and i am already having nightmares about him entering the new school year next week. I just want to wrap him up and keep him happy- I have already asked for the Autism specialist at the school to work in a few days where she can help him. She writes down the things we need to work on, things we need to write a social story about.

Ask the school about what can be done to help. If anything spy on him during a lunch period :) I've done it... I'm terrible. Loll
He started seeing a therapist who specializes in kids on the spectrum and she has given us great ideas. he learns when things are visual- so we have traveling cards- cards at home with writing on them ( he is past the pictures) and I make sure to review them when we have a few minutes.
have him read you a social story on the way to school- that works too...

I hope the best for you and your son! I can truly feel the mom pains with/for you.
ask the school ad see about a specialist for ideas-- sometimes it feels like I run out- and it's nice to get new ones from his "feelings doctor" :)

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