Three-Year-Old daughter. Please Help!

by Samantha

My three year old daughter has had issues from the start. She got early intervention p.t. and o.t. by the time she was 5 months old. She had/has low muscle tone. As a baby, she had to have all liquids thickened by Simply Thick and rice cereal b/c she would choke and turn blue on thin liquids.

She was late on all physical development (crawling at 10.5 months, walking around 17 months, etc).

"W" sits all the time. Always falls for no reason. Always bruised from falling.

She has always hated sunlight and needs sunglasses (my little vampire).

Hates having her hair brushed/washed.

She HATES clothes, especially underwear and pants. She insists she always has a "wedge" and wants her pants below her butt. She hates shoes and takes them off all the time, even in the car. Hates the car seat b/c of the crotch strap.

She doesn't interact well with other kids and tends to want to be with adults (not sure if it's the noise or fear of being hurt). She also doesn't like large crowds.

She sleeps a lot for her age (10-12 hour nights, 2.5-3.5 hour naps everyday).

She used to spin for long periods of time. She has since lessened the amount of time she does that.

I don't know if this is related, but she can't follow directions to find something (she can't look for things, even if we tell her that they are on, in, under, or next-to something that she can see). Our 18-month-old can actually find things faster and more easily.

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Dec 20, 2011
by: Anonymous

some great posts in response to your concerns are already here. isn't this a great tool?!

as a mother of a child with sensory processing issues, it would seem that from early on, you have picked up on differences. trust that. and continue to search until you are satisfied. :)

i can say that i knew from early on, my son had more difficult time with certain things that most other children. it's taken several years and research and asking questions and time working with an occupational therapist to pinpoint some things and made some ground, but it's possible and for that i celebrate! there is hope, there are so many wonderful resources as was already mentioned. websites, books, professionals, etc.

i would say too that, i would if you have read at all about dyspraxia? i have some experience with this and wonder if some of the things you have mentioned about your daughter could be related to this. dyspraxia can affect many different areas of development. everything from speech to coordination, to spatial awareness, also called proprioception), to fine motor skills, to clothing/food texture issues, etc. it can all be affected, and it is real.

here is a quick link:

i would suggest that it would be worth your time, if you haven't already, to print and do the 'symptoms checklist' on this website. it can be very eye opening and it appears that your daughter does have some sensory integration challenges, similar to my son who does have a mild spd diagnosis.

i would also suggest, finding a qualified occupational therapist. we have benefited greatly from working with one over the past few years. there is also a link on this site to help you locate one in your area if you need that direction.

good luck. stay the course, you are not alone, and you are a mother warrior! she's a very lucky little girl to have you plugged in. :)

Dec 20, 2011
you're on track!
by: Anonymous

hello there!
i would say you are onto something. things you mentioned are definite flags (sensitivities to light, clothing etc)...and even the last part about not being able to follow directions/find things. look at visual processing. My 7yo is just like that...he can have the item he is looking for at eye level 5 feet from his face and he is turning in circles looking for it. It is definitely real.
Lots of great resources here, welcome!!!

Dec 20, 2011
Your Her Best Advocate
by: Anonymous

Start a notebook diary. Page 1, list of all her accomplishments, the age she did them, etc. Page 2, list of what she is not able to do, retain, etc. including the in, on, etc., Page 3 List any and all diagnosis, who gave them, what treatment she had, who did the treatment, how long each therapy was, etc. and if they worked or didn't work. If she's in school, have her teachers write a letter as to her progress, what they see in school, etc.

If she is in school, enlist the help of the school therapist or counselor to get her early intervention now.

I am not a doctor, nurse or professional, just a mom with a sensory child who is now 12 years old with a lot of the sensory issues you listed (not the non-sensory). Don't sweat the small issues. If she doesn't want to wear pants, including underpants, put her in dresses & skirts letting her know that during school days and outings, underpants have to be worn, but when she gets home she is free to be free, but she must be respectful about the privacy of her body and keep covered by a long dress or skirt or nightgown, etc. Socks are still an issue with us also, she doesn't wear them, she wears flip flops to school most the time. Find the softest, most comfortable pair of socks, and also crocs work well. As far as her hair, cut it short, allow her to tend to her hair hygiene of brushing. When she feels she has control over her own comfort, she will start training and learning for herself how to adjust.

The main thing is to be flexible & don't sweat the small things such as clothing, hair, etc. Most sensory kids do not grow out of their sensory issues, but they learn to adapt and train themselves, with your help of course. You may have to try multiple shoes, socks, hairbrushes, etc. But your frustration will only frustrate her.

Go to you pediatrician armed with your daughter's diary. If insurance allows, get every type of testing through them & the school. You have access to the internet, read, read, read and read some more. There are so many wonderful books and knowing you're not the only parent out there is half the battle.

We pray for you & wish you well.

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