Problems at home differ from school?

by matthew
(united kingdom)

Our son shows more complicated behavior at home than he does at school.would this be usual,as school is a more formal place of learning.our son has one to one support and is statemented,but it is hard to diagnose him as he is quite compliant at school.my wife and i have gone through the check list and he does show many of the signs listed.

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Mar 26, 2012
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A Definite Difference!
by: Canadian School Counsellor

Hello from a Canadian School Counsellor in British Columbia. The comments posted are pretty universal, it seems. I work with a lot of kids that have good days in the school setting and get home and "dump" their emotions in the home setting. It seems the safety, predictability and love of the home setting tiggers the emotional release of a difficult day at school. With my caseload of kids, I am always hearing about the difficult parts of their school days. They work so hard just to "fit in" and not be different, then they get home and try to process these difficulties and get overwhelmed. When I consult with parents, I tell them this behaviour is a compliment to their parenting skills, as these emotions would not be released if the setting wasn't safe. Using anxiety strategies may help - predictability, preteaching, prelearning, organizing the night before, etc. Thanks for the opportunity to comment on this topic.

Mar 01, 2012
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I agree
by: Anonymous

I agree with both posts. Children with sensory impairments, at home, they release their frustration that they have held at school.

Mar 01, 2012
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Same issues
by: Vicky (uk)

Hi , It's reassuring to hear other parents with kids acting the same as our daughter who's 8.She is a perfect pupil in school and contains her tactile defensiveness issues within school as I think she is concious of what her teachers and school mates would think of her if she had a melt down . But she definitely seems to bottle up her emotions and lets rip when she's at home !
I have found her emotional out bursts do get worse if she has a lot of schoolwork to do (homework is a real battle) and if she's worried about something. Having a reward system does help sometimes but not always .

Feb 29, 2012
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Home vs. School
by: Anonymous

Yes, from my reading and our personal experience with my daughter it is true that SPD kids can "keep it together" for periods of time when they are at school, church, friends' houses, etc. and then have their SPD issues manifest at home.
I think it is because they feel free to be themselves and release their emotions when they are in their home environment and with the people they know and trust the most. In fact, we notice that the longer she is forced to keep her emotions/symptoms on the inside, the greater the meltdown when she finally comes home.

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