This Is Very Real

I have a nine year old son that was diagnosed with ADHD and Oppositional Defiant Disorder at the age of five. However, along with all the characteristics that go along with these two, I always knew there was something else going on.


After doing a lot of research on the internet, I came across SPD and Asperger Syndrome. It was almost like someone flipped a light switch on.

When he was a baby, he had colic. Was a very serious baby and temperamental. Banged his head on floor out of anger at 1 1/2. Did not like socks on his feet. My son was kicked out of daycare at the age of two. At the age of 3 and 4, he had so much trouble with any babysitter. Was kicked out of preschool. All of this was due to aggressiveness. Got suspended in first grade more than once.

This is when the medicine nightmare began. Was on Adderall, Ritalin, Staterra, and many more. This helped the hyperness somewhat, but brought on terrible anger and mood swings. Would not eat. Lost so much weight that he looked like a cancer patient. Very pale. Also in second grade he was suspended a few times. All of this was due to aggression. He could not keep friends and his self esteem went downhill. School said they could not help him.

He would beg me not to give him those pills because he said they made him angry and tired all the time. Not to mention the chest pains he complained of. Even though the doctor assured me this medicine was nothing to worry about. I decided to take him off the medicine roller coaster and homeschool. He has gained about 15 pounds and looks wonderful. He feels so much better. The terrible mood swings and sad thoughts have disappeared. He laughs all the time now.

With all this said, I still feel at a loss of what to do some days. He is nine now, but still acts like a five year old. Hates certain noises, still does not like to wear socks, torments animals, likes to be constantly stimulated with tickling, likes those vibrating back massagers. Would want to sleep with it. Is very loud making noises. Still drools sometimes when talking. Afraid of the dark, has trouble sleeping. Does not like flushing the toilet, scared of it I guess. Does not like to touch any food that he has dropped on the floor. Still has temper tantrums. Wants to hang on to me in the store like a two year old, likes to play tackling games, run into walls for the fun of it. Hit things. Now, he is complaining of constant pain everywhere on his body at all times of the day, yet, he wants to play tackle games two minutes later. The list goes on forever.

I am at a loss of what to do for him and our family. I can't seem to get any help from the schools and can't afford any outside help. From what I read, there seems to be no solution for this. Thanks for this site. I hope my story will help someone.

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Sep 21, 2009
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need advice
by: Anonymous

You seem to be describing my soon to be step son exactly. He is nine years old and most of the time also acts as if he is five. He is very small (his 7 year old sister is bigger than he is) Im at a loss at how to handle it. He failed a year in school and is only in the 3rd grade. He has very few friends and on occasion when hes mad at another child has talked of stabbing them. He took a bullet to school last year and was kicked out, but the school eventually let him back in. Stealing & lying have been a problem.

This weekend his father allowed someone to stay the night which never happens. I got up early and walked in his room what I found shocked me. He was pulling his sisters pants down! I admit I freaked, when I asked him why he said "so his friend could see." Im not responsible for his Dr. visits or his medication but quite honestly it seems to me hes only getting worse. His time is split between his father and I and his mother. Does anyone think there is more going on or is this typical of a child with ADHD & ODD?

Sep 03, 2009
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A couple of things may help...
by: Tracy Demkowicz

When I read your story I felt like you were describing my daughter. She just started 3rd grade in a school for children with behavioral problems and does everything else you spoke of. Go to smartknitkids.com...they have seamless socks that are amazing! I don't have to fight with her about wearing them at all.

Another thing that we were told to do is put her on the Feingold diet which eliminates all artificial food dyes from their diet. You can look it up on line. It makes shopping harder because you have to read labels on everything but it was well worth it for us. It made a huge difference in her behavior. Good luck!

Feb 15, 2008
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There's hope with meds....
by: Joy Mom of Trevor

I just want you to know that my son Trevor, age 5, was put on Adderall for ADHD combined type. It affected him the same way! He went from a playful smiling happy boy to a nevil mean machine. He was hitting, biting, and cursing along with many other things. He was depressed or so it seemed to me. He was shouting I hate you to everyone. He had stopped smiling, stopped talking in conversation and he was throwing things, getting so angry that he sat on the floor and tried to rip his own clothes off himself. I decided to take him off the Adderall all together it is in my book the "Devil's pill".

The problem then was he was only taking Risperdal and was unable to sit still in class again. So I went back to the dr's office. I told them that he needed something other than the "Devil's Pill". So they prescribed Concerta ER 18 mg... it's a time release pill. Well there was little change but at least he wasn't agressive anymore. So they upped the dosage to 27 mg and there it was... the perfect dosage for him!

Now Trevor is under control enough to function every day and without side affects. Trevor's meds are as follows: He takes 2 mg of Risperdal twice a day one at 7 a.m. and one at 7 p.m. He also takes one Concerta 27 mg at 7 a.m.

He still has his good days and bad days, but at least it isn't bad every day now. Adderall in my opinon only; is just not good for young children... it effects their emotional state of mind to much. You could speak to his Dr. about the use of Cooncerta for your son. Oh yes, by the way the Concerta has not effected Trevor's weight either. When he was on Adderall he lost 8 pounds in just the one month he was on it. I am happy to say he has gainned 6 pounds back now.

Please remember your son is a good child with a bad problem he can't help and once they get his meds right you'll see a new boy. Keep the hope up. I can tell you're a great mom and he is lucky to have you just by reading your post.

Dec 17, 2007
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There is hope
by: dale

There seems to be lots of times when it feels like there is no hope. I guess the best thing to do is be there for our children and let them know that no matter what life brings, we are there for them.

What seems like too much for us, is ten fold for them. Ive seen my son in first grade go through peer pressure trying to stay caught up with the other kids. I see him struggling to make friends. I see him struggling to do school work as fast as others. What he is going through, and the fact that he does it everyday, says something about the character he has. Let us (especially me) remember, that no matter what life throws at us, it is nothing to what our kids are going through.

Dale


Dec 17, 2007
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You are a good Mom
by: Amy

My son is in 2nd grade an turns 8 today. I see many similar behaviors/issues. You are so good to have given him the time and energy you have even though it's draining. We have seen an improvement in the last year in our son, just by changing our attitude from "why is he acting like this?" to "why is he doing this?" (what is he seeking) and what can we do to help him?". He will sense that you are there for him, advocating for him and respond to it (you say he laughs and smiles now). Keep doing what you feel he needs---you've come a long way and he loves you for it.


Dec 17, 2007
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Help
by: dale

How did you come across the diagnosis? The school just tested my son. On processing information, the average score for a child is 90, he scored a 7. What is next. What can we do to help him?

Get him to an OT for therapy!! Check the backissues of my newsletter (issue #1 and issue #20 for some relevant ones); you can find them by clicking on my newsletter button, then clicking the backissues link! He will need some good therapy and perhaps "special (specialized) education". Talk to the team at school about where to go from here, and if possible, please get him into private OT as well to address the SPD!!

To find out more about SPD, the diagnosis, etc... go to my site map and go through the appropriate articles that will help you understand the diagnosis. OT's will usually be the ones to officially diagnose SPD. If he has significant processing issues (which he does), you may also want to consult a neurologist and/or developmental pediatrician to rule out other diagnoses.


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