Trouble my whole life

by Hayley
(OK)

As a kid I would freak out if I saw a gum wrapper near me or any kind of small trash near me. I would throw a fit until someone got rid of it.

I hated the sound of kissing.

I hated the sounds the would come from my dad while he was chewing food or talking just after eating a bit.

I hated things that were soft.

I hated being tickled.

I hated the clinking that forks make on plates.

I hated the sound of my brother's and mom's dry feet on the tile and carpet.

I hated the sensation of something on my dry skin, especially sand or soft clothing.

I had to tie and re-tie my cleats over and over again, never happy with how my feet felt inside them.

I would get car sick easily.

I would get a fight or flight feeling during dinner with all the noises that were freaking me out, and I would flip out. Yell, throw a tantrum. Throw my food. Get sent to my room.

The only thing that has changed is the trash thing. I still freak out about everything else, especially when hearing my dad chew or feeling something to soft. I hate it. It crushes my dad. It makes me hate myself.

Ear plugs sort of help, but I just want to be normal. For some reason, most of my problems surround noises that my dad makes. I don't know why.